Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Hurdles, Hiccups, and Headaches

Once again, this marathon is quickly creeping up on me.  Yes, AGAIN.  Tecumseh was canceled and rescheduled due to weather last month, so I was "able" to continue training.  These past few weeks have definitely been a test of my patience, stamina, strength, and overall will. 

When Tecumseh was canceled, I honestly felt lost.  For the few days it took for them to decide if it would be rescheduled, I had no idea what to do.  Do I continue training?  Do I find another marathon?  I was seriously scouring the entire planet for a trail marathon in January...even as far as New Zealand.  I honestly felt like a crazy person.  Then, the email came that it had been rescheduled for January 11.  Whew!  Sigh of relief....until reality set it....

Let's see...if the marathon is now a month away, that means I have to do another 20 miler.  It also means I have to keep getting up at 430am 4 days a week.  It means I have to train through not only Christmas, but also New Years.  Ugh.

On top of that, Mother Nature decided to take out all aggressions that she has been bottling up for the past couple mild winters and come down on Northwest Indiana with almost everything she has in December!  We went two weeks without a temperature over 20 degrees, which meant negative numbers at 5 am most morning with the wind chill.  It also meant the trails were covered in snow and ice for most of the long runs on Sundays. 

I wish I could say that despite all of her raging, frigid, snow enhanced belligerent transgressions, I persevered and continued my training flawlessly...but I can't.  I'm human.  I get tired.  I get bad attitudes.  I want to quit. 

I want to quit so badly, it haunts me on a daily basis.  Yet, I won't do it.  I know myself too well.  I will see this through all 26.2 fun, hilly miles. 

I went back and read my first post about running this thing.  I can honestly say this training has changed me.  It brought me out of one of the darkest places I have been.  It brought me back to life.  It might "just be a marathon" to most people, but for me, it has been synonymous with everything I wanted to overcome.  It almost feels poetic that I trained for so long and couldn't wait to run, only to have it postponed.  This marathon has already taught me so much, but one of the greatest is that it is not what happens to you that defines who you are, it is the way you respond and how you overcome what happens.    Bring it on Tecumseh.  And someone please give Mother Nature her meds!